If
your friend is in an abusive relationship she may not
want to tell anyone because she might think it's her fault.
If you notice bruises on her body or if you notice her
boyfriend putting her down or controlling her, you can
bring up the situation by just letting your friend know
that she doesn't deserve to be treated that way. We can't
tell our friends what they "should" do or what
they "need" to do. But we can always offer them
information about what is abuse in a relationship and
what resources are available. Remember, you might save
your friends life by offering them emotional support and
being there for them with out judging their situation.
Believe
the victim, don't ask questions like "What did you
do to
make
your boyfriend that mad?"
Let your friend know that you are there for her.
Let
your friend know that you are concerned for her safety,
and
that you are afraid she is going to get hurt more.
Help
her to recognize controlling behaviors within the
relationship.
Let
your friend know that the abuse is not her fault and that
Don't
become angry with your friend if she is not ready to
leave
the relationship.
Don't
spread gossip… it could put her in danger.
See
if she needs any medical attention… she may not realize
how
badly she is hurt.
Find
out resources in your neighborhood and your friend's
neighborhood.
Give
her correct information about abuse…you both can
call
your
local crisis hotline and get information and support.
Encourage
your friend to get counseling or to join a support
group
for teens in the same situation.
The
most important thing you can tell your friend is that
you are concerned for her safety. Let her know that you
are afraid she might be seriously injured during the next
fight with her boyfriend.
Remember
that abuse can happen in anyone's relationship…even
girls can abuse boys. If your friend is male, all of
this information can apply to him too. A male friend
will be even more embarrassed to talk about the abuse,
so please be sensitive to his feelings and encourage
him to get help too.
